Yankee Bashing Jokes!

Q: Why should you never run over a Yankee fan on a bicycle?
A: Chances are it your bike!

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Q: What did the Yankees fan use for birth control?
A: His personality!

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Q: How do you make a Yankee fan laugh on Monday?
A: Tell him a joke on Friday!

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Albert Einstein is at a party and asks one of the guests, “What is your IQ”
“165”
“Great, we can talk about nuclear physics and cosmology”
After a few minutes of lively discourse, another party guest tries to get in on the conversation.
Einstein asks him, “What is your IQ”
“64”
To which Einstein replies: “GO YANKEES!”

A teacher asks her students if they are Yankees fans.
One of them says, “No, my Dad is a Red Sox fan, my Mom is a Red Sox fan, so I’m a Red Sox fan.”
So the teacher says, “Well, that’s not very good; if your mother and father were both morons, would that make you a moron too?”
“No, that would make me a New York Yankees fan.”

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Q: Why is it good to drive a car with a Yankee fan?
A: Because you can park in the handicap zone!

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Q: What do you get when you combine all 25 yankees with 25 lesbians?
A: Fifty people that dont do dick!!!!!!

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A Boston Red Sox fan, a New York Mets fan, and New York Yankees fan were all in Saudi Arabia performing military duty for the U.S. Army. While off base, they were caught sharing a smuggled case of booze. All of a sudden Saudi police rushed in and arrested them. The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offense in Saudi Arabia punishable by death!

With the help of good lawyers, they were able to successfully appeal their sentence down to life imprisonment. By a stroke of luck, a benevolent Sheik decided that they could be released after receiving just 20 lashes of the whip. As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheik said, "It's my wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each one of you one wish before your whipping."

The Mets fan was first in line (he had drunk the least), so he thought about this for a while and then said, "Please tie a pillow to my back."

This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through. The Mets fan was carried away bleeding and crying.

The Yankees fan was up next (he had almost finished an entire fifth of alcohol by himself), and after watching the scene, said "Okay, please affix 2 pillows to my back."

But even 2 pillows could only take 15 lashes before the whip went through again, sending the Yankee fan crying unbelievably.

The Red Sox fan was the last up (he had finished off the crate), but before he could say anything, the Sheik turned to him and said "you support the greatest baseball team in the world. Your supporters are the best and most loyal fans in all the world. For this you may have TWO wishes'"

"Thanks, your most royal highness" the Red Sox fan replied." In recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you give me not 20, but 100 lashes."

"Not only are you an honorable, powerful man, you are also very brave," said the Sheik. "If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And your second wish. What is it to be?" the Sheik asks.

TIE THE FUCKING YANKEE FAN TO MY BACK!

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Q: Whats the difference between the Yankees and a mosquito?
A: A mosquito stops sucking


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It's career day in elementry school where each student talks about what their dad does. Little Johnny is last, and finally the teacher calls on him to talk about his dad. Johnny comes to the front of the class.

'My daddy is a dancer at a gay bar. He takes off his clothes for other men, and if they pay him enough money, he goes into the alley and performs sex acts on them.'

The teacher is shocked, and she calls for an early recess for the rest of the class. She sits down with Johnny and asks him if this is really true about his dad.

Johnny says; 'No, but I was too embarrassed to say he played for the Yankees.'

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1. what is the difference between the yankees and a buckett of shit?

...the buckett.

2. what is the difference between a yankee fan and a pot hole?

...i would swerve to avoid the pot hole.